It's an emotional day--one year since my mom left us. It's almost unthinkable to write those words. To think that a whole year of all the holidays, birthdays, milestones, and what would be considered normalcy has already passed, and yet the absence of my mom and the shock of it all still weighs on my heart. Maybe it always will. Maybe you just can't lose someone who was such a huge part of yourself and ever be the same. We will celebrate her life next week at a dinner with almost 50 of her family and friends, eating oysters and po-boys and toasting this incredible, joyful person who graced all of our lives and left us all so much better for it. She never wanted a funeral. Instead, she told us to all go out and eat a wonderful meal together so that is what we plan to do. I had a dream recently that we were just starting the celebration when all of a sudden, I saw her there. She had brought Mamere, her favorite aunt, and when I asked what she was doing here, she said that she would never miss this celebration. I think that's true--she would have loved this gathering and I have to believe that she will be there.
Mason compiled this video from lots of pictures I sent her that came from photo albums over the years. We will play it at her celebration of life.
So much love to you, Mom, you are in my thoughts every day.
"If I didn't know better
I'd think you were talking to me now
If I didn't know better
I'd think you were still around"
(Taylor Swift, Marjorie)
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